As I was exploring churches last year, I stumbled into a place that was full of the spirit and the expression of the Gifts of the Spirit were present at every meeting. And as much as I was beginning to remember the church I missed so many years ago, I got lost in the worship time as I communed with God. I really did ask him for direction in finding a church, life decisions, my relationship with him, and just a piece about knowing where I was at. I was troubled with knowing where to go and what to do with my life. I had been on a path of leadership and testing some of my theories alongside the teachings I had received in college, but in a few short months the whole group collapsed and dissolved. How discouraging. I was displaced and disillusioned about what I thought I knew about almost EVERYTHING.
So there I was sitting in worship and among all the others in the room I felt a move of the Holy Spirit and I began to giggle. And as much activity as was surrounding me it wasn’t a laughter that was noticed. And I heard, let yourself laugh. So I did. An expression of pure joy and physical release I just laughed and laughed and laughed. It became a form of therapy by expressing this laughter that resulted in feeling freedom and release. As this joy and relaxation covered my body, I truly felt as innocent as a child laughing as I ran through a park on a sunny day.
Once the singing and laughing had calmed down, I heard these words in my mind and I reached immediately for my journal. In years past, I was completely dependent upon the inspired words of others to be those heart piercing messages from God. I had not felt God impart on me a special decree or specific word of knowledge to my own ears. And here it was a specific set of words JUST FOR ME, TO ME, FROM GOD.
Miracles happen in the context of laughter. Your faith is standing right here with you right now!!! Christina, God loves to hear your laugh. He is not embarrassed, he revels in the joy and music that is your laugh. It is special and sweet, so unique to who you are. It is touching to his ears and heart when you laugh. Allow your laugh to resonate to the heavens; sing in your laughter as the joyful woman you are.
In that moment, I was touched, encouraged, inspired, and lifted about 5 stories from where I was emotionally. This last week at camp, I had more than 3 people comment on my laugh being an important part of bringing joy to the campers. They even prayed that the joy that was inside my laugh would fill each child I encountered. I had never looked at my laugh that way. I didn’t even think much about how I laugh or why. I just know I feel it, so I do it. I know that I smile as a pure response to people looking at me because I want them to know I saw them. I also find that laughing is a good response to just about anything.
When I first visited the new singles group last year, I was playing speed scrabble for the first time and let’s just say I’m NOT so good with the spelling and such. I don’t like crosswords or regular scrabble-did I mention I loved MATH? But as I was attempting to just have fun and play along with whatever was going on, I was just being myself. One of the gals looks up at me and says, “You laugh at everything. You make me feel like I’m funny. I like you.” What an amazing compliment. My laugh in its natural state moved some one to like me, without much effort. I had never had that honest a comment before.
Such an amazing word, as well as a confirmation that who I am and what I do is a good thing. Some days the natural does come through positively, ahhhh what a nice feeling – finally.