As much as I love reminding myself that we are human beings and not human doings… there are things I WANT him to DO, either with me or for me. Yes yes yes I realize that a relationship is a 2-way street and that I will need to offer just as much as I expect, but that’s for another posting. If the pattern has not yet emerged there are distinct parts of my list that change from must to should because these things in my mind are GRAVELY different. Just in this same way do I believe that a man has a nature or certain way about him that is his being as seen above.
- He must enjoy hanging out with people in several different social situations accompanied with a good sense of humor. Feeling confidant to express himself as an individual relating to people, while enjoying being part of a couple.
As much as people have been telling me and telling me that I should be looking for someone who compliments my personality and strengths, I am just having a hard time believing I could live everyday of my life with someone who doesn’t like people. I know there is a difference between being social every night of the week with big groups of people and staying at home for a relaxing causal weekend with family. But as much as I am recharged by people and enjoy learning about them and what is going on in the world, I think I would struggle immensely if I had to go to all or most of those things ALONE.
- He should be willing to try new things: take in the best and worst of movies, adventure into the grand outdoors, go with me fishing, stroll through city streets, yell & cheer at a crowded sporting event, view fine pieces of theater, history, and art, take in a concert from time to time, lay out under the sunshine and stars, take a dip or smooth sail across that next big body of water, venture upward in a hot air balloon, drive that extra mile to the next state or lighthouse on my list, and snuggle inside with a good book or two.
I know I spend a fair amount of my time at home, recharging or resting it seems that it is healthy (so they tell me); but I also on the great grand quest for the next new thing. Let me be clear it does not have to be expensive, luxurious, or showy. But having the energy to try new things or go to the things we already love not just once a year or when we have 2 weeks of vacation stored up. It is being willing to not let all the weekends fade away into history, but to step outside the routine and the schedule of life and obligation and do things that create memories, relax the mind, rejuvenate the soul, and make some GREAT STORIES.
So do these things seem superficial or irrelevant? They may not be points of character and spiritual significance, but their importance seems to be very strong. Maybe this comes out of my experiences with what seems like many many men who want to stay home, do not much, and avoid as many people in life as humanly possible. So these may not be biblical principles, but its my list right?
- He should allow a little mess to be here and there from time to time and be patient that cleaning day is coming. He should feel free to communicate when enough is enough in any subject, chore, or habit, but allow time for change to occur.
So among all the details and thoughts about him, this one is more about me and knowing that the man I will be with can extend me grace in the areas I know I don’t like and have to work at being good at. Well but if I really think about the pieces of my list… They are all about me right?